One of the biggest conversation struggles when talking to teenagers is when they feel defensive and then don’t respond. For example, “Did you finish your homework?” might feel like an attack (especially if they haven’t finished it), and their response may be closer to a grunt than discernible language.

So here’s a super sneaky (and easy!) strategy to help avoid the common grunt. Instead of asking direct questions, try, “I wonder...”

For example:

“I wonder if everyone has finished their homework.”

“I wonder how your day was today.”

It sounds silly - it’s almost the same thing, after all. But it works! Saying, “I wonder” makes kids feel that you actually are curious and not attacking them. It’s a nice way to show a child that you want to be involved without making them feel like you’re constantly interrogating them.

Give it a shot! Let us know if it works for you!